Blood and Wine

The cystoscopy procedure I have rejected.

Let me clarify that the main reason is my fear of discomfort.

The procedure entails inserting a narrow inspection device into the urethra, i.e. up the penis in my case, to look at the sides of the channel, and then up into the bladder to inspect the lining.

At my recent visit to the haematology clinic, I asked the surgeon, Dr Hammond, what would he be looking for. Polyps he replied. Sounds like some sort of seaweed or mollusc, I thought, but asked what they are. Small tumours reply. And what will happen I leave them? They will grow you will have lots of pain and bleed profusely. I asked if they could just go away or is there any other way to get rid of them other that to cut them out via the cystoscopy. The answer was that there's no record of them disappearing without surgery.

Ok I said, as I don't want to be operated upon then I see no reason for the inspection. He offered a general anaesthetic but I pointed out the risk of damaged or death from barbiturates etc. was to avoid more than the cystoscopy.

Here are some of the vulnerabilities I have.

• Feeling emotionally, weak as I couldn't exactly do much when it is going on or should I say in
• The thing breaking inside my dick or bladder.
• The probe is likely to cause some disturbance to the flesh which will result in possible bleeding and discomfort.
• I don't take well to self inflicted discomfort so I will get tense and hence have less ability to self-heal

That said, if, after doing my own urine tests, I am of the opinion things are not stable or improving, I will be more include to undertake the manoeuvre.

Next is get some info and provide links to this procedure. Keywords: polyps, cystoscopy, transitional ???? something Dr M said.